swissmarg: Mrs Hudson (0)
swissmarg ([personal profile] swissmarg) wrote in [personal profile] inverarity 2011-03-12 07:31 am (UTC)

Definitely better. Title is great now. Also what you've done with the wolves and foregrounding of Alex works well. Not sure about those heads all bunched up in the corner though... I was thinking of something like was done here: http://www.cmdistro.com/images/xlarge/15290.jpg or here: http://goodcomics.comicbookresources.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/06/B&B66.jpg

for those background faces, where they're in the sky/clouds and are more ghostly than really there. The monochrome coloring also helps to make them not as distracting.

I'd also nudge the planet/moon up a bit.

And seriously, a teaser chapter for summer sounds like a great idea!

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