Someone else commented that she was a follower... Nah. Anna simply knows that Alex is a leader and can't be lead herself. Can't rely on others. So she's worked to put herself, and her others in a position where Alex CAN turn to them and ask for help. and.. she's succeeded.
That was me! I commented that! :D Validation!
Seriously, though. What you described is exactly what I meant by her being a follower. She's a good follower, no doubt...but still a follower.
Anna's a great friend for Alex, don't get me wrong. But IMO, a romantic relationship shouldn't involve one person being a "leader" and the other person putting herself in a position to be asked for help, should the leader find it convenient to do so.
Like, at the end of Deathly Regiment, where Alex basically goes all JROC and literally gives orders to Anna. (She does something similar when they confront Mary at the 1/3 point of Stars Above.) That kind of thing is disturbing enough when they're friends; if they start dating and Alex still orders her around, it's even worse.
All that said, I wouldn't put it past Inverarity to have them start dating, and it would probably make for an interesting storyline. But I think of "shipping" as wanting people to get together and stay together, not temporarily hook up, and in that sense I can't honestly say I ship Alex and Anna anymore. :(
See, I don't see that as following. I see Anna being tryign to take control from the back. She places the restrictions she thinks she can on Alex, and slowly is reining her in. the problem isnt' so much that she's a 'follower' as it is that Alex is a rather thoughtless friend.. .and right NOW would be a pretty poor lover. She isn't READY for a relationship.. not even with another "leader'. She needs to start thinking more about those around her :) and that's true for friendships and relationships both... and when she matures like that... I think Anna would be a good pair for her :D Heck, getting together with Anna could be the thing that mellows her out--when she realizes that hurting her loved one REALLY hurts and is bad... encouraging the equalization :)
Yeah.. It's not so much that she's a leader00she is, but it's more that she's thoughtless. SHe's getting better, but isn't there yet XD
You have a point. She always feels bad afterward, but hasn't let that affect her pre-action decision making yet. But I'm still not convinced they'll ever outgrow the unbalanced power dynamic that they now have. It's not a matter of Alex hurting her loved ones; it's a matter of Alex can order Anna around but not the reverse. I don't see that changing. :/
See, I think you're wrong :) If you look at the different between alexandra in thorn circle and alexandra in stars above, you have two totally different alex's. In the first book she really didn't care much about who she might annoy, now she's deeply apologetic when she can't tell them what her plans are. And she doesn't take nearly as many stupid I DO WHAT I WANT risks either. (she still takes them, but the ones that anna don't know about tend to be fewer and further between... if I recall correctly (and i could be wrong) the biggest 'risks' she takes in Stars Above are when she is HUGELY emotionally distraught, or when she's unexpectedly set upon, forcing her to change the plans they'd worked out ahead of time.
The balance of 'power' has been evening out, as ALex becomes more mature, and as Anna learns to step up a bit and be more independant herself then what she had been at the very beginning of the series.
Besides. Alex doesn't ALWAYS order anna around. It's only in tight tense situations where there's not a whole lot of room or time to debate (I believe they DO debate when there IS time) and where the two of them fighting it out would be bad. Most relationships--friend and otherwise--tend to have a 'leader' anyway... just like my husband and I. he 'leads' for financial matters, I control around-the-house matters like laundry and dishes, He deals with the 'outside' stuff, computer hardware, etc, I deal with finding other assorted types of information and the wrangling of our pets. I don't see Alex and Anna as so different. Only instead of the matter of who cooks dinner, Alex deals in the 'off the cuff life and death' things, and anna doesn't. Anna takes part in the planning of things, plotting and working things out ahead of time. Anna is the one who'd sit there and say "Alexandra, you are sick. You are going to go have a bowl of soup, then get at least 2 hours of sleep. THEN you can resume your planning." Right now, it isn't an equal share of power, no, but I see that changing--compare still to the first book or two where Alex crashed through, looked back over her shoulder at the mess she'd left and yelled back "Sorry!"
She is better, don't get me wrong. You're right that she talks it out with her friends more (with the exceptions you noted). But if Alex wants to do something, there's never really any doubt that she'll end up doing it. She might talk with Anna (and the rest of her friends) about it, she might even argue with them about whether or not it's the best thing to do, but I don't believe I recall a single time Anna (or anyone else, but especially her) has managed to convince Alex not to do something.
I'm not saying it was immoral for Alex to order Anna around. Given the situation, it was fair enough. But IMO, in a healthy relationship there'd be no need for orders; requests would be enough.
As for the power dynamic issues...well, I think partly we're just coming from different life experiences. A lot of my relationships--maybe even most--don't really have a 'leader.' I've never been married so I can't speak to that. But I don't think the Alex/Anna relationship even has the "different spheres of authority" thing you talk about. Alex is basically in charge everywhere.
Now, maybe you're right that in time, their personalities will change to the extent that a romantic relationship would be healthier. Undoubtedly they are much different than how they were in Book 1. But as they are now, I just can't ship them. :/ Want them to hook up for a time, yes--I think that would be interesting--but stay together forever, no.
Well, at the very least I hope that, should her eventual partner (if she even has one, which is definitely not a certainty) wants her not to do something, that will change what Alex wants to do, some of the time. She'll never stop being reckless and headstrong, but there's a difference between that and "I don't care what you think I should do, I'll do whatever I want anyway."
(And yes, I'm aware your post was mostly a joke, lol.)
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inverarity) wrote2012-06-07 10:58 am
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That was me! I commented that! :D Validation!
Seriously, though. What you described is exactly what I meant by her being a follower. She's a good follower, no doubt...but still a follower.
Anna's a great friend for Alex, don't get me wrong. But IMO, a romantic relationship shouldn't involve one person being a "leader" and the other person putting herself in a position to be asked for help, should the leader find it convenient to do so.
Like, at the end of Deathly Regiment, where Alex basically goes all JROC and literally gives orders to Anna. (She does something similar when they confront Mary at the 1/3 point of Stars Above.) That kind of thing is disturbing enough when they're friends; if they start dating and Alex still orders her around, it's even worse.
All that said, I wouldn't put it past Inverarity to have them start dating, and it would probably make for an interesting storyline. But I think of "shipping" as wanting people to get together and stay together, not temporarily hook up, and in that sense I can't honestly say I ship Alex and Anna anymore. :(
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Yeah.. It's not so much that she's a leader00she is, but it's more that she's thoughtless. SHe's getting better, but isn't there yet XD
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The balance of 'power' has been evening out, as ALex becomes more mature, and as Anna learns to step up a bit and be more independant herself then what she had been at the very beginning of the series.
Besides. Alex doesn't ALWAYS order anna around. It's only in tight tense situations where there's not a whole lot of room or time to debate (I believe they DO debate when there IS time) and where the two of them fighting it out would be bad. Most relationships--friend and otherwise--tend to have a 'leader' anyway... just like my husband and I. he 'leads' for financial matters, I control around-the-house matters like laundry and dishes, He deals with the 'outside' stuff, computer hardware, etc, I deal with finding other assorted types of information and the wrangling of our pets. I don't see Alex and Anna as so different. Only instead of the matter of who cooks dinner, Alex deals in the 'off the cuff life and death' things, and anna doesn't. Anna takes part in the planning of things, plotting and working things out ahead of time. Anna is the one who'd sit there and say "Alexandra, you are sick. You are going to go have a bowl of soup, then get at least 2 hours of sleep. THEN you can resume your planning." Right now, it isn't an equal share of power, no, but I see that changing--compare still to the first book or two where Alex crashed through, looked back over her shoulder at the mess she'd left and yelled back "Sorry!"
Give them time <3
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I'm not saying it was immoral for Alex to order Anna around. Given the situation, it was fair enough. But IMO, in a healthy relationship there'd be no need for orders; requests would be enough.
As for the power dynamic issues...well, I think partly we're just coming from different life experiences. A lot of my relationships--maybe even most--don't really have a 'leader.' I've never been married so I can't speak to that. But I don't think the Alex/Anna relationship even has the "different spheres of authority" thing you talk about. Alex is basically in charge everywhere.
Now, maybe you're right that in time, their personalities will change to the extent that a romantic relationship would be healthier. Undoubtedly they are much different than how they were in Book 1. But as they are now, I just can't ship them. :/ Want them to hook up for a time, yes--I think that would be interesting--but stay together forever, no.
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Do you think this would be different with any partner Alex might wind up with? ;)
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(And yes, I'm aware your post was mostly a joke, lol.)