inverarity | AQATSA: Update and Character Sketches

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AQATSA: Update and Character Sketches

Warning: Rambly 'cause I'm tired and short on sleep.

So I am up to 192K words and 30 chapters.

I'm actually enjoying the current chapter a great deal. Alexandra at her bitchiest, followed by Alexandra at her bravest. And oh yes, she's going to be slapped. Repeatedly. (Maybe not literally slapped. Or maybe so.)

So we all know the big Avada Kedavra debate, right? That is, if the Killing Curse is unblockable instant death, why doesn't anyone who knows it just use it every time, assuming they're fighting to kill? There are plenty of perfectly reasonable fanon answers, but it's one of those things that I don't think Rowling thought through at all. But she got away with it, because magic in the books is all lights and special effects and "results-based," i.e., a spell does whatever the story requires it to do at the time. Rowling did work out a somewhat consistent, but not really very consistent, set of magical "rules," but it worked for her. Unfortunately, I don't quite have the storytelling style Rowling does that let her get away with the narrative legerdemain that kept the reader from noticing inconsistencies; more importantly, I have a rules-based mind that gets hung up on little details and logical inconsistencies.

I need to update Alexandra's "grimoire" -- the list of spells she knows. I try to make sure I have recorded everything I've demonstrated her learning/using in the past; it would be rather embarrassing for someone to point out: "Why doesn't she just use that Collaportus spell she used in eighth grade?" On the other hand, there's been a lot of vague "She learned lots of dueling spells from Max, and she learned lots more in the Dueling Club," so that gives me a certain amount of liberty to pull new ones out of my ass when it's appropriate. Also she spends lots of time studying, and in class, and I don't have to itemize every single spell she learns at the time. But new spells she whips out can't be too useful or convenient or powerful or she starts to seem like she just hit a Power-up.

Mostly, I try to make sure any magic she uses that is significant to the plot has a firm foundation in her previous experience. This is where writing the whole book first, rather than posting each chapter as it is written, as many fan fiction writers do, pays off. If I need Alexandra to cast a Shrinking Spell in Chapter 25, I can go back and make sure Shrinking Spells are mentioned in Charms class in Chapter 4.

Dueling, though, is a pain. I'm trying to make dueling seem like... well, dueling, but really, it doesn't make much sense for Harry Potter wizards to duel like fencers. I try to provide a bit of justification for varying one's attacks and defenses, with my own interpretations and assumptions (like that there is more to Blocking and Deflecting than a Shield Spell that acts like a force field), but frankly, it's one of those iffy areas Rowling hinted at when she wanted dueling, and then forgot about. I feel like elaborating on it too much begins to make the story read like the dreaded fictionalized Role Playing Game where you can tell the author has written up a character sheet for the protagonist. So mostly I handwave it and try to make magic stay magical (and vague, and not really explained). It's better to preserve the Harry Potter-ish feel and describe balls of light and glowing hornets and clouds of black spikes and whatever else sounds cool than make people think too hard about combat efficacy.

Right now, I find myself dealing with logistical problems. Alexandra is in a precarious physical situation that requires a whole bunch of physical and magical maneuvering to get out of, and I've been going on and on with it, and while I can clearly picture it in my mind, it may read really tediously (or worse, improbably) to the reader. This is definitely one of those times when I need to just keep writing. Get past that scene, move on to the next chapter, fix it in editing. 'Cause my betas will tell me if it's stupid/drags/doesn't work, right guys?

More art! That isn't mine!

This is a different artist than the one doing the cover: I wanted some good character illustrations to replace the Poser ones I've been using. These are rough sketches.

No picture anyone has ever drawn, nor any of my Poser images, have perfectly captured the pictures I have in my head of my characters with 100% fidelity, but these come pretty close.

Alexandra Quick

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Wow, I love these sketches! The girls all look really close to how I imagined them, too. I saw David as more hard, street-smart, and darker. He looks too preppy to me in this one. Maybe a different hair style would make a difference. The Pritchards are awesome with their eerie pale eyes. And I really like Anna's 'Little Red Riding Hood' outfit, too.

As to the writing points:

- Combat/duelling. I am not one of those people who expect extreme logistical realism from fight scenes. If it sounds pretty plausible, I'll accept it. People who nitpick that kind of thing too closely are honestly just looking for something to complain about. I also think that as a culture we are strongly affected by Hollywood, which has defied the laws of physics so often we're surprised to see them at work when they do come into play. But as you say, in the end it has to work within the story, and the result is what's important. Has this scene accomplished what it was supposed to? (Defeated the bad guys, dealt a blow to Alexandra's ego, questioned so-and-so's loyalty?)

- Lists of spells. This is a really good thing to watch out for, and it must be harder and harder, the more words you've got behind you. And I'd think even more so if you are inventing spells that weren't in the original books. On the other hand, Alexandra (and all the other characters) are not super-human, and under pressure, they may forget they knew a certain spell, or may not have thought of applying it under those circumstances. So that's an 'out' as well. I mean, even Hermione had her moment of hand-wringing when confronted with the Devil's Snare.

Heh -- actually, David is not hard and street-smart. That's the image he tries to project, but I hope it's been slowly becoming evident that he's basically a rich kid from a privileged background. He'd like to be more like his athlete father, but he basically is a preppy.

The poses are gorgeous. Except in the Anna one, she looks so playful-- in the last full body shot she doesn't even seem to be holding her wand-- and I've always seen her as more serious and reserved.

I'm not good at picturing action on the page in my head, I'm not even good at figuring out exactly what's happening when there's action happening on a screen, so like the commenter above, I mostly care about whether an action scene furthers the narrative.

In terms of knowing the exact right spell, or the appropriate canon equivalent: it almost always feels too neat/clever to me, because as a reader you know it's a story, and that the author made sure the character would have just the right tool/information. I'm also not a big fan of mystery novels.... But having things still not turn out too neatly, having there be negative consequences in spite of knowing the right spell, makes it *feel* realistic. Even if the spell was in fact never mentioned previously at all, because I'm bad at remembering details and if you sell me on it I'm not going to bother to check if it actually appeared in chapter 4.

And in fraught situations I'd totally buy the Devil's Snare excuse. I forget relevant info all the time, even when I'm not stressed.

I actually told the artist to draw Anna looking cheerful, because she is so serious and reserved, most of my images for her have made her pretty gloomy. I thought it would be nice to see her smiling for once.

Wow, I didn't see David like that. I always thought he'd have really short hair, like a quarter-half inch buzz. Also, I like Anna with the Little-Red-Riding-Hood look. Makes me chuckle.

Now, obviously there's a difference between the sort of spells one uses in a duel and the sort that one uses outside of duels. In-duel spells, imo, Alexandra should have plenty of variety and aptitude. Out-of-duel spells, on the other hand, I don't think Alexandra would have any real depth or aptitude, nor do I think she would have much of an interest in addressing that. She seems to me to not be the sort of student who really cares about things that don't have practical implications in her life, and she's so single/narrowminded that she doesn't really see the point in the rest of it.

Of course, that's just my opinion, I could be wrong!

~DarkSov

David did have short buzz-cut hair in book three. He's let it grow out a bit. I see him as still trying to figure out what his "image" is.

I have been trying to make a distinction between dueling spells and actual combat (sort of what Max was teaching Alex in book two -- the difference between sport dueling and "wizard-dueling"). Mostly I've been defining it as "You can't use potentially lethal spells in sport dueling," but as Alexandra gets more into both kinds of dueling in book four, I need to write it in a bit more detail.

Yeah, I get that, but I don't really have an idea of what Alexandra's feelings towards learning spells are. For example, I don't know why she would choose to learn or not learn a particular spell. Shock-and-awe? In-duel effects? Ease of casting? Furthermore, does she care about legality? The answer to that is probably not, but I don't know her reasoning--is it merely teenage rebellion, does she have a political objection to the Confederation banning certain spells, does she just object to the idea of banning spells, does she find herself sort of in a middle ground where she wants to know every spell she can but isn't sure if it's morally right to know some spells?

I find it most likely, especially with what you've said about her frame of mind and maturity, that she finds herself in a middle ground where she wants to know and use spells that achieve her goals at almost any cost; but at the same time, she's aware of the sort of suffering that the extremes can cause and is hesitant to delve deeply into certain waters. It's the sort of internal conflict that I imagine becoming the center of her growth as an adolescent and a key factor into her biggest decisions down the line.

~DarkSov

Also, I imagined Alexandra's face as being thinner, and maybe a touch more gaunt, like she's been having trouble sleeping.

~DarkSov

I imagined David chubbier, and the Pritchards somewhat less serious, but no matter, these are great sketches.

I do imagine, however, that wands are generally pointed at whatever one wants to effect magic on, whereas in these sketches, they are sometimes held like an umbrella or a tennis racket.

--Geneva

David, chubby?

The Pritchards do look a little serious -- I asked the artist to lighten them up a bit in the final sketch.

As for spells -- that's true if they are casting a spell "at" something, but in some cases they may be performing a ritual. (Or in David's case, posing.)

Well, the trouble with trying to make fantasy or superhero stories coherent is that however hard you try....

The artwork is terrific. I love the way the characters move and act, and even though Charlie in the alexandra pics is hardly more than a few strokes of a thick brush, they are strokes that live and move. I think the Pritchards look a bit too Scandinavian for my taste (and I can't imagine them without freckles!), and was it your idea that one of them should be left-handed? But never mind these quibbles, with this guy you've struck oil, and if I ever wanted to try again to do a mini-series I would ask for his/her address.

I tried to say all this hours ago, but Livejournal has been in an extended snit and has managed to delete two successive versions of this comment. In fact I've had time to completely lose one computer and reload Windows from the start in another, so LJ has been really really naughty. I'm wondering whether it is time to start again somewhere else, but I like the format and I hate to drop a whole environment of friends and such.

Lol at the video. LJ was nasty for me today too (and off and on for the past few days, really slow and buggy). Sorry to hear about your computer. :(

Whoops - I didn't even think about Forbearance being left-handed in that picture.

Have I ever described the Pritchards as having freckles? I suppose they might have a few. I think it's the scarfs that give them the "Scandinavian" look. The artist was using my Poser images, so I pointed her to some pictures of proper bonnets for her to use in the final illustration.

LiveJournal was crap for me this morning, too. You can always switch to Dreamwidth (which lets you automatically import everything from LiveJournal), though I don't think there's any guarantee that DW won't suffer from technical problems as well.

Can't sets of identical twins have both a right-handed twin and a left-handed twin? I read somewhere that it depends on how early the 'split' happened.

So this is real life...

Have you ever described the Pritchards as having freckles. Nope. That's how I see them. But I would say that freckles are a very frequent by-product of country living in warm climates - such as Dixieland - on people of north European descent, so they would be likelier to have them than most. And I like freckles!

I've wondered why they didn't just use the eagles in the first place! But that was only after I read the whole series about five times.

That is, if the Killing Curse is unblockable instant death, why doesn't anyone who knows it just use it every time, assuming they're fighting to kill?

Don't they, though? Rowling never detailed her battles that much, but I did get the impression that the Death Eaters, at least, tended to use AK almost exclusively.

Keeping track of the precise spells you've explicitly mentioned Alex knowing/doing is a good idea.

As for dueling: I don't think it's necessary to make magic dueling seem like fencing dueling. There are a number of different types of dueling, after all, including with guns, etc. I think it's much more important to make it interesting to read.

I feel like elaborating on it [dueling] too much begins to make the story read like the dreaded fictionalized Role Playing Game where you can tell the author has written up a character sheet for the protagonist.

Not necessarily; it depends on how you do it. For example, talking about general theory--what kinds of defensive and offensive spells there are and the like--or individual strengths and weaknesses and styles--Alex likely being an all-out attacker who isn't very mindful of her defenses, etc.--shouldn't be too RPG-ish. As long as you don't get into detailed descriptions of individual spells, or like, assign damage values to them or something, there's likely nothing to worry about. Then again, I probably have a higher tolerance for this kind of stuff than most.

Alexandra is in a precarious physical situation that requires a whole bunch of physical and magical maneuvering to get out of, and I've been going on and on with it, and while I can clearly picture it in my mind, it may read really tediously (or worse, improbably) to the reader.

Action scenes are difficult. I actually think tediousness is a more dangerous enemy than improbability here--I think people are willing to overlook the latter once or twice, but the former is always unforgivable, especially for action scenes, since they're supposed to be fast-paced. The general issue is, describing the action in enough detail to make it easily picture-able usually makes it long-winded and boring. I don't really have any advice in this regard; probably the only way to get better at them is to practice.

I really like the pictures. :D

-TealTerror

The Death Eaters used lots of non-AK spells (like during the battle in the Department of Mysteries, and in the final battle).

We'll see how I do with the magic "technicalities" and action scenes...

Edited 2011-04-04 22:15 (UTC)

Rowling always describes spells as colors, usually with a descriptive word like "sickly" or "sluggish", particularly when describing spells that are dark/evil or that Harry and co would have no way of knowing. When it's something they're familiar with, they'll name the spell, like "stunner". It's a generally accepted fanon invention that the AK is a much more difficult spell to use, or at least takes a degree of power or other ability to use, primarily based on what fake-moody says in book 4 about the whole class combined not being able to do anything with it.

~DarkSov

Thanks for the details. It's been a while since I read the books, lol.

It could also be the case that since AK is effectively just a straight beam, it might not be as tactically useful occasionally as spells with a less straightforward area of effect.

And I have faith that you'll do well, Inverarity. :D

-TealTerror

Isn't it also sometimes more tactically advantageous to wound, rather than kill? A badly hexed or wounded wizard needs immediate help on the battlefield and ongoing medical care. If their allies lose or have to leave them, they become a new bargaining chip and potential source of information. Also, leaving behind people who are even half as traumatized and incapacitated as the Longbottoms is a blow to morale that death and new martyrs may not be able to equal.

You already set up that foreign time-turners have extra bells and whistles over and above God's honest British time Turners.

You wanna make American AK better than British AK? Chapter 10, Alex goes to Herbology class and learns the new rules; chapter 20, Alex and Anna and David and the Pritchards fight bad guys and apply the new rules.

As was stated before: what is the purpose of each fight scene? The big Boss fight scene at the climax is tricky; Alex fights red-shirts on the way to conronting the big boss, just recycle fight scenes from previous adventures. We'll only notice ifn you do it too often.

Love the drawings, but why does Alexandra have such big feet?

Also, I think she is too pretty in that drawing. I've always pictured her as a tomboy who would grow into her looks, which should begin to happen during AQATSA.

Dunno, I think nearly everyone else around her needs to be slapped a lot harder than Alex...

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AQATSA: Update and Character Sketches

More art! That isn't mine!

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Rhemus de excidio

Great Drawings

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